WOMEN, SCORNED: Online soap opera casts CoMo courts in bizarre melodrama

Hell hath no fury, even in court

COLUMBIA, 7/5/12 (Beat Byte) -- Forged emails. False accusations. Naughty encounters. Husbands stolen. Women scorned. Restraining orders. Family courts. Columbia, Missouri.

 

It's all in a soap opera-esque blog that last month cast former Boone County assistant prosecutor and 2006 Republican judicial candiate Connie Sullivan, now a Columbia-based private practice attorney, in the role of daytime dramatic supporting villainess.

The blog's "he said, she said, her attorney done me wrong" melodrama included the remarkable charge that Sullivan, in her zeal to get the goods on an opponent, impersonated not a police officer, but -- a journalist!

 

Along with the cast of characters, the April 30 denouement -- during which Sullivan reportedly withdrew from a restraining order case before Boone County Judge Christine Carpenter -- even included the perfunctory hair dresser.

 

"So there we are -- Haley, Tom, Connie, Sarah and even Haley and Connie's hairdresser friend, Nichol, all hanging out in the courtroom while Connie Sullivan, Esq. admits to impersonating a journalist with help from an assistant," writes the soap opera's screenwriter and leading lady, Osage Beach resident Annie Schulte (above).

 

Reportedly tuned into with daily abandon by bored cubicle refugees all over mid-Missouri, Husband Hustling -- the soap opera's reality-bites style title -- follows Schulte as she avenges the honor of good friend Sarah, who lost her husband to a scheming, conniving 32-year old honey-blonde house hussie named Haley.

 

During any given episode, Haley is up to her old tricks, man hunting -- and manhandling: her female enemies with catty delight.

 

"As if I needed yet another activity, Haley has filed an ex-parte [restraining order] against me," Schulte writes. "Her excuse for filing said ex-parte was that I posted her phone number and home address on a 'hate site.' She further claims that this and a video I posted on my 'hate site' endangers her child. Here – just read for yourself."

 

What follows is that friend of every judge -- the pro se (self-represented) plaintiff's hand-scrawled complaint, complete with details of kids in jeopardy, Internet threats, online abuse, verbal stalking -- and a "hate blog with 29,000 hits" (all those bored office workers).


Husband Hustling: The Soap debuted last August, when "Tom" -- described by Schulte as "an average looking (at best) short little married guy" -- walked out on wife Sarah and their two little girls, "sending them into a tailspin of sorrow and therapy appointments."

The culprit: Haley, of course. Though other details seem sketchy, Sarah -- the woman scorned -- is best friends with Schulte, who turns Terminator and Equalizer in equal measure to avenge Sarah's honor, good name, and hurtin' heart.

"Once upon a time there was a boy and a girl who loved each other," Schulte posts. "Then a slut came along and ruined everything."

 

When Haley apparently decided she'd had enough of the months-long melodrama, she -- and Tom -- sought a restraining order and hired Sullivan.

 

In the lead up to the court date, Schulte alleges Sullivan approached her under false pretenses, pretending to be a journalist named Melinda Twidwell writing a story about "individuals who have wronged others."

 

"I am a freelance journalist," Twidwell/allegedly-Sullivan emailed Schulte, using the email address This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. "I often write anonymously or under pseudonyms or nom de plumes due to my need for safety."

 

Schulte posted over 42 pages of emails, Skype transcripts, and text messages between herself and the reporter-imposter, dishing on a dance of deception that included secret meetings, WTFs, LMAOs, personal asides, napping children, and several near-miss attempts to avoid detection on Twidwell/allegedly-Sullivan's part, including a phony press pass complete with photo (page 24) and plenty of cagey dialogue.

 

One weep-fest convinced Schulte to invite the reporter-imposter to hang out "on my deck if ever she needed to get away from Columbia."

 

Even Sullivan herself appears, wondering in an email to Twidwell -- her alleged alter-ego -- what in the world is going on. Got that? Sullivan allegedly emailed her alleged self (this is the wild, whacky world of Husband Hustling.)

The war of women went to court April 30, with Judge Carpenter dismissing the ex parte and Sullivan withdrawing from Haley and Tom representation -- a move Schulte gleefully blames on the whole journalist impersonation thing.

Sullivan denies she impersonated a journalist or a person named Melinda Twidwell.  The case dismissal, she told the Heart Beat, had nothing to do with the impersonation charges. 

 

The war of words, meanwhile, cattily continues.

"I’m really starting to get concerned about whether or not you’re going to be able to afford your magical Pinterest wedding," Schulte scoffs at Haley, now preparing the final act in her man-theft drama. "I’d be willing to donate some mason jars and spray paint that can be fashioned into the gown of your dreams."

Husband Hustling
http://www.husbandhustling.net/
http://husbandhustling.blogspot.com